so much to do but still have time to think about...

I have a feeling its going to end. I have a feeling that its God's punishment to me too. Hard to tell nonetheless. Maybe the current situation is for my own good. Its hard to accept changes when you prefer things being routine. Yup...I admit...I'm afraid of challenges and risks. I like to feel secure. Though now I'm starting to accept the new changes, it still hurts sometimes. Ever had the feeling of having something you treasured so very much and for very long and to only have it taken from you in such a short time? The times and memories before were sweet...it made me felt good. It was a beautiful feeling to have...a common feeling for a very, very long time and experienced by countless of people and still craved by many till now. Whatever happened to patience and faith? Now I understand why its so hard. Most want results instantly. Patience and faith on the other hand are on the long-run. I confess...I had wanted things my way many times. I shiver at the thought of pain, shame and ridicule. Regret and dejection makes my heart ache and my teeth clenched in frustration. But I guess these things build you up. These things make you a richly charactered individual. I'm still afraid but it helps to look at the brighter side of things sometimes.